Ok, so this is a new style of post for my page as I thought I’d share some of my thoughts about solo female travel planning in your fifties. First off many of you might wonder why on earth I am travelling alone. Firstly, why not? Secondly, he will be joining me later. Fear not, I am not abandoning him.
I think it is important to lay it out there that as a female solo traveller that there are always going to be more things to consider than if you are a male solo traveller. I have travelled independently before, in my teens and twenties I went to Egypt alone, rafting on the Dorgdogne and the aforementioned trip to Mexico, and a trip to Uganda in my forties etc. However, with all of these I met up with other solo travellers. I’ve also travelled to Seattle and New York alone, but as I used to live in the US, these count less. You will always, positively or negatively, draw ‘some’ attention to yourself just by ‘being solo and female’.
So the trip I am planning for is back to South East Asia and whilst, some of it will be with my better half and I do have a base with my brother and sister in law in Johor Bahru for some of it, I am planning to do a trip over to Borneo on my own at the start.
I am therefore going to try to list how I set about this as a solo, female traveller in my fifties and then add on the things that need considering. Do also bear in mind, this isn’t meant to be a blog suggesting that any age is better than the other, or that solo travel is superior or less, just that it does take some planning and there are LOTS of great blogs to choose from if you’re solo adventuring in your younger years, but less for us who have just passed the 40 boundary!
First off, it’s easy to be far more confident in your fifties! This can be both a blessing and a curse. I have far less trepidation doing this than I would have if my 19 year old daughter was doing the same. This is partly because I have travelled quite a bit, so I think I know what to expect, certainly in SE Asia, but also because I have wrinkles and some grey hair, so far less likely to be harassed. As is the case in many countries, I’m actually more likely to be respected as an older person as is often the culture, particularly in Asia or Africa.
But, I am 50, and thus more wizzened by experience and age, so possibly a little more suspicious, thus more protective of my cash, cards, passport, shadow, other people etc. This comes, sadly, from a previous encounter many years ago in Europe wherein my husband and I were duped out of some cash and a rather more worrying account with a drunk driver and his gun in South Africa in the 1990s when I was hitchiking with friends! This does lead me to be more reserved with talking to others.
I am more confident in my ability now than my 18 year old self to navigate transport timetables or money exchange and I like to think I have a ‘fairly good’ ability to sniff out a tosser! I also have, possibly more importantly, as a 50 year old, a financial contingency that would get me out of somewhere fast if I needed it to ie: if I needed a hotel and it were more expensive than my budget , or I was stuck somewhere and needed a taxi or a flight and fast. It is far more scary to be in a country on budget as a teenager who may not have the financial resources to back up and get you out of a tricky scenario.
The things I do need to be more aware of as an older traveller, however are time zones. It’s easy to pack in A LOT but then be too knackered from your long haul to actually enjoy it. I have therefore factored in a rest day at the start of my trip.
My levels of comfort have changed. Whereas when I was a teen or younger traveller, I would have been happy in a tent or a budget hostel, these days, the thought of lying on a bed where I can feel the springs for any more than one night is always going to push me to booking somewhere with at least 3 stars or lots of glowing reviews Princess and the Pea style, and I always carry my sleeping bag inner and mozzie net.
As an older traveller I am aware of my own idiosyncracies: I am an overthinker. I like to plan and research and plan and research and prepare, and sometimes even a bit more planning! I will have a Plan A but also a Plan B and likely a Plan C! This doesn’t mean I don’t or can’t throw caution to the wind once I know the lay of the land, but I do need those intial plans are laid out.
I know my limitations in terms of ability, desire to dice with my mortality and food! I feel the latter two are linked!
I always carry my own loo roll! See the previous point!
I am far happier doing less and observing more.
So my top tips would be:
- Choose your flight wisely, look at your time zones, think about the direction you are travelling and choose the best your budget will give you. I’m doing a late afternoon from the UK which I hope to sleep on, as it runs into my ‘sneaky nap time when I’m home alone’…this lands me in Changi the early hours of the next day for which I intented to use for absolutely bloody nothing.
- Pack wisely: again, obviously country relevant, but also think about ‘how’ you pack it. I’m not sure I have the answer, but for me, I’m doing a 65l backpack designed for a woman – this is SO important, with a waist belt – also SO important. It has a small day sack that zips to it that I can remove for the zip over to Borneo, leaving the crap I don’t need behind in Malaysia with the rellies. I have also used it several time before, and like me, it’s worn in, so it’s not on its virgin outing creating a dichotomy between the two of us! My cabin bag is going to be a holdall style so I don’t need to carry something else on my shoulders. It’s also easy top access for the flight, so I don’t end up throwing all the contents over my neighbour when trying to find my headphones or socks and turning the air blue with my cussing!
- Do your research! I want to see the Orangutans – it’s a bucket list thing, (especially as I missed out on the Gorillas in Uganda thanks to a nasty dose of giardiasis that put me in Bwindi hospital learning fast how to use squat toilets!) therefore I have looked up countless blogs about where and how to etc. If you feel at all unsure or unsafe, speak to your hotel in advance. It may be that they run the trip you are looking for and for a fee they may be able to organise it. This is what I will likely do as I know I can get a Grab car there, but unsure if I can get one back. I also now avoid salad in tourist hotels!
- Don’t cram it all in. Sadly, whilst we may only feel 18 and may be as fit as fiddles, we may also find it just slightly harder to overcome the jet lag or even the day/night before.
- Take some travel strength probiotics (and start them prior to your trip.) Whilst you may ‘think’ you have the iron constitution of the clasp Mrs T’s favourite handbag, and maybe you do, new foods and spices are slightly harder to get to grips with on the sunny side of 40!
- Choose your accomodation for location rather than low cost budget being the priority. If you are a female, it is likely you are going to feel a little more comfortable in areas that are well populated or easy to find or lit up at night. Stretch your budget here if you need to. Contact your hotel in advance to let them know you are a single female traveller, for no other reason than they may be quicker to respond to your requests to put you at ease.
- Always remember a scarf for covering your head or shoulders, and a pair of flip flops (for your feet obviously!)
- Get an e-sim for your phone, it can be done online before you leave the UK with some companies, alternatively, buy a Sim in the country you are in so you always have communication. Put your emergency contact in your speed dial.
- Download any apps you think you might need if you can before you go: Grab is a useful one, also if you can find train or bus apps that allow you access to timetables or even paying your ticket online.
- Finally, think about your time of the month if you are unlucky enough to still have to! Whilst you are likely to find what you need, products may not be what you are used to, and sanitation equally (see my earlier Bwindi experience!) Bring hand sanitiser and nappy bags so you don’t feel uncomfortable. Remember there are many cultures that do not discuss feminine hygeine as we tend to do in the west, so be mindful.
Ok, so I am sure I haven’t thought of it all, I’m sure there are many of you out there who are far more travelled as solo female travellers than I am and I’d love your top tips. Finally, I will add to this retrospectively as hindsight really is a beautiful thing!
